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Maybe Belichick's "Hoodies' Franchises Will Be A Winner

Jan 22, 2008



First Store Will Debut On Super Bowl Sunday

Boston
- Diversifying his interests beyond the gridiron, Patriot coach Bill Belichick has started a new retail franchise business, "Hoodies R Us,"  with the first location opening on Super Bowl Sunday in a mall in downtown Providence, R.I.  "We thought the cross promotional benefits would be tremendous," said Belichick.

According to a business associate of Belichick, the store is considering several slogans, including, "Hoodies Today. Hoodies Tomorrow. Hoodies Forever” and “Goodie! Hoodies!!”
 
A portion of the company’s proceeds will be donated to the “Hug-A-Hoodie Foundation,” which Belichick founded to encourage sweatshirt wearing in third-world countries and France.
 
When asked whether he was worried about competition from industry giants such as Armani, Tommy Hilfinger and Marc Ekco, Belichick said, “We make one hoodie at time, that’s all we can do. Everything else will take care of itself.”
 
Regarding complaints from other retailers alleging illegal video taping at their facilities, Belichick patiently explained, “We don’t listen to what to others say.”
 
A question about a copyright infringement claim regarding their logo’s backward letter, irritated the coach and ended the press conference. “I don’t know what they’re talking about,” Belichick snapped. “The ‘H’ works in both directions.” 

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Reader Responses
Feb 3, 2008 11:32 PM
Harold O'Ziffenflexer
IT'S BELICHOKE TIME!
  • After a rousing speech by Roger Clemens proclaiming his innocence to felony charges for lying to Congress, supporters in Katy, TX reported a flock of flying pigs rose from a nearby tree, circled the crowd and flew off into the sunset.
  • "However, this is a wakeup call," said Clemens after his perjury indictment. "I'm going to look closely at my lying."
  • Politico is reporting that former GOP House Majority Leader and fellow Texan Tom DeLay will advise Clemens, pro-bono, on how to employ smirking sanctimony to deny wrongdoing at his upcoming trial.
  • "We have enough potty-mouthed motherf..kers in the NFL," said NBC analyst Tony Dungy in blasting Jets' coach Rex Ryan for hiring former Jet Blue flight attendant Steven Slater as an Assistant Food Services Coach.
  • Responding to a tidal flow of fan protests over the "boring and stupid" New Meadowlands Stadium name, New Jersey officials announced the facility will be called "East Rutherford Just Off The Jersey Turnpike Field."
  • "It has nothing to do with Brad personally," commented Brett Favre about reports of a rift with Minnesota Viking's coach Brad Childress. "I just don't trust anyone who's bald and wears glasses."
  • World Extreme Cagefighting has applied to the International Olympic Committee to add cagefighting as an official event for the 2012 games in London.
  • "If he'd been my mother-in-law, none of this would have happened," said Francisco Rodriguez about the incident which resulted in his arrest for assaulting his father-in-law at Citi Field ... and a season-ending injury.
  • "My hand hurts," said Dustin Johnson after failing to write "I will not ground my club in bunkers anymore" 1,000 times on Whistling Straits' main blackboard. "He's 11 sentences short," said a PGA spokesman in announcing Johnson's immediate suspension. "Rules are rules."
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