eTrueSports Logo Sunday, March 26th, 2017
<< Back

Sterling Calls for NBA 'Caucasian Classic" in Testimony

Mar 25, 2015


Los Angeles, CA (eTrueSports) - Donald Sterling isn't through with crazy, not by a long three-pointer. 

During testimony today in a surreal court case involving his non-girl friend and his estranged/non-estranged wife, the former Clippers' owner, attempting to avoid questions about former gal pal V. Stiviano, bizarrely proposed the NBA add a second all-star game, The Caucasian Classic, to the NBA All Star Weekend.

The proposal is being met with skepticism at NBA league headquarters, sources have told eTrueSports. 

"What? You gonna play three-on-three full court?" said one executive.

Sterling, apparently desperate to restore his good name, testified that former NBA commissioner David Stern would be an ideal choice to referee the game. 

"Dave hated blowing the whistle on rich, white guys," Sterling explained, "so the game will have lots of buckets and hoops being made."

Sterling dismissed concerns that the Caucasian Classic might be boring.

"Jumping is overrated," Sterling told Judge Richard Fruin, Jr.

<< Back

Reader Responses
No responses for this article
  • Following Jerry Jones' comment that it was "absurd" to link football with chronic traumatic encephalopathy (C.T.E.) disease The Flat Earth Society has withdrawn an invitation to Cowboys owner to address their annual convention. "We can't afford to be embarrassed," said a Flat Earth spokesman.
  • Trump Razor Wire mogul's next venture sources tell eTrueSports. "If Donald's elected, best investment ever," says Trump insider.
  • Trump campaign pulls invite to Hall of Famer Goose Gossage to address Miami rally. "We can't afford to be embarrassed," says spokesman.
  • Paul O'Neill calls for hummus ban at Yankee Stadium. "Terrorists eat it," explained YES Network announcer and Trump supporter.
  • Citing opposition to re-branding state name, sources close to Trump say mogul abandons plan to buy Florida prior to Republican primary on Tuesday, March 15th.
  • Trump demands Knicks' rookie Porzingis produce birth certificate. "Kristaps? You call that an American name?"
  • "Who doesn't love the Indy 500?" said Donald Trump after being endorsed yesterday by NASCAR CEO Brian France.
  • Fast food chain Trumpy's Tacos files for bankruptcy. "Hispanics know nuthin about Mex food," says owner Donald Trump.
  • Heard any good rumors?
    Email the publisher!