eTrueSports Logo Friday, April 18th, 2014
 
<< Back

Knicks, Nets Join Hoboken CYO

Nov 12, 2009



"I Think We Can Be Competitive" - Knicks GM Donnie Walsh

New York - With one victory between them in their first 16 games, the two New York metropolitan-area professional basketball teams, the Knicks and Nets, have announced they are leaving the NBA to join the CYO league of Our Lady of Perpetual Help in Hoboken.
 
"It's a pretty good brand of ball," Knicks GM Donnie Walsh said. "But I think we can be competitive."
 
“Nyet comment” said the Nets’ prospective new Russian owner Mikhail Prokhorov, who was reached in Moscow. Prokhorov, the 6’9” billionaire Russian oligarch, is reportedly being investigated by Commissioner David Stern for calling Nets coach Lawrence Frank “shorter and dumber than Putin.”
 
In a related story, the Fort Wayne Mad Ants of the NBA D-League have applied to replace the Knicks in the tough Atlantic Division. “With the acquisition of Rob Kurz we now have five players,” said the Mad Ants’ coach Joey Meyer.

<< Back

Reader Responses
Nov 12, 2009 1:44 PM
Dukie4ever
About what are the Ants mad?
Nov 12, 2009 1:42 PM
Yo
Stern is in Frank's corner because Frank makes Stern look tall
  • Oklahoma center Kendrick Perkins touched the rim late in the 2nd quarter of the Thunder's game against the Pacers on Sunday, eTrueSports has learned.
  • In another example of government-regulation-gone-wild, the FCC has ruled that at least one minute of broadcast time during each hour of Masters broadcasts be reserved for “non-erectile dysfunction” products.
  • "Karma's a bitch and she's got a long memory," a spokesman for the American Buddhist Club told eTrueSports about Tiger Woods' withdrawal from the 2014 Masters.
  • Papa John's Pizza pitchman Jim Nantz has taken the lead in the Annual Worst Actor In A Commercial Award, eTrueSports has learned. "Truly embarrassing," a longtime Madison Ave. executive said, who called the currently airing national spot "as cheap and crappy as the pizza."
  • Tigers' star Miguel Cabrera announced he will use a portion of his $248 million contract extension to purchase Detroit. "Good write-off," said Cabrera.
  • A crowd outside WFAN studios supporting Mike Francesa was dispersed without incident by the NYPD late Friday afternoon. "Neither of them had their hearts in it," a patrolman told eTrueSports.
  • Knicks' owner James Dolan will finance and star in "Spawn of the Dead," described as a "horror film with comedic elements," eTrueSports has learned. The Mets Jeff Wilpon and Yankees' Hank Steinbrenner are reportedly considering co-starring roles.
  • A challenge overturned the Mets' GM Sandy Alderson's 'We're-a-90-victory team' assertion in the first pre-game use of MLB's new replay system. "Delusional and sad," said a source close to Commissioner Bud Selig.
  • Sources close to new (and currently suspended) Auburn coach Bruce Pearl are denying reports that mandatory Candor Deficit Disorder (CDD) treatment is part of Pearl's Auburn contract.
  • Heard any good rumors?
    Email the publisher!