eTrueSports Logo Sunday, March 26th, 2017
<< Back

"It's Not Snyder's Fault, We Just Suck"

Nov 5, 2009

Dissident Group Calls on Fans To "Admit Reality" 
Washington – Some Redskins fans think owner Dan Snyder deserves a break. “Just admit it. We suck,” said a spokesman for the dissidents, who call themselves Stop Snyder Sniping (
“The Redskin debacle has got nothing to do with Dan Snyder. All he does is own this piece of shit.”
A spokesman for a rival fan organization, Fire Snyder ( accused the Stop Snyder Sniping splinter group of being “quitters in an epic battle to unseat a despotic king.”
 “It’s not like we don’t think Snyder’s an asshole,” responded the Sniper spokesman, “but our point is simple: we suck.”
In related news, Federal Express is denying any role in the defacing of the Redskin's FedEx Park sign. For months Federal Express has been unsuccessfully attempting to void their stadium sponsorship contract, calling the Redskins an embarrassment to the professional package delivery business. “We don’t know anything about the sign,” a FedEx spokesman chuckled.

<< Back

Reader Responses
Nov 17, 2009 1:28 PM
PSpin, don't believe everything, or anything, you read on this site.(Btw, did you know Snyder was an all-state quarterback in Maryland? And you have to admit Six Flags is a helluva amusement park. Our fav.)
Nov 14, 2009 6:11 PM
No surprise that doesn't actually exist.  The domain is available if you guys want to snatch it up. 

It is Snyder's fault the team sucks.  He's a businessman who runs the franchise like a business.  He's good at making money but it's not working that well because he has no respect for the quality of the overall product and no respect for its customers.

  • Following Jerry Jones' comment that it was "absurd" to link football with chronic traumatic encephalopathy (C.T.E.) disease The Flat Earth Society has withdrawn an invitation to Cowboys owner to address their annual convention. "We can't afford to be embarrassed," said a Flat Earth spokesman.
  • Trump Razor Wire mogul's next venture sources tell eTrueSports. "If Donald's elected, best investment ever," says Trump insider.
  • Trump campaign pulls invite to Hall of Famer Goose Gossage to address Miami rally. "We can't afford to be embarrassed," says spokesman.
  • Paul O'Neill calls for hummus ban at Yankee Stadium. "Terrorists eat it," explained YES Network announcer and Trump supporter.
  • Citing opposition to re-branding state name, sources close to Trump say mogul abandons plan to buy Florida prior to Republican primary on Tuesday, March 15th.
  • Trump demands Knicks' rookie Porzingis produce birth certificate. "Kristaps? You call that an American name?"
  • "Who doesn't love the Indy 500?" said Donald Trump after being endorsed yesterday by NASCAR CEO Brian France.
  • Fast food chain Trumpy's Tacos files for bankruptcy. "Hispanics know nuthin about Mex food," says owner Donald Trump.
  • Heard any good rumors?
    Email the publisher!