eTrueSports Logo Tuesday, October 21st, 2014
 
<< Back

Carmelo: Google's SportsApologies Widget Works Great!

Apr 16, 2008



Denver
- Does Google’s just launched SportsApologies widget work? Just ask Denver’s Carmelo Anthony. “I didn’t know what to say when I got nailed for the DUI,” said the Nuggets' all-star forward. “At first, I even had my lawyer apologize for me. Boy, that didn’t work! Then someone turned me on to Google’s SportApologies widget.
 
“It’s easy! All you do is punch in your sport, and whatever it is you got busted for, and up pops a perfect apology. Slam dunk, problem over. This is the greatest gift to professional athletes I’ve ever heard of.”
 
The slogan for Google’s SportsApologies? "Don’t fidget, we got a widget."

"I thought widgets were just short people," said Anthony, "wow, did I learn a lesson!"
 
“I only wish SportsApologies had been around when I got into trouble,” said baseball’s Pete Rose. “I’d be in the Hall of Fame instead of having to scribble autographs at card shows to put food on the table.”
 
A spokesman for SportsApologies said that Carmelo Anthony’s situation is “precisely what our mission is about.” And, presumably, why the prescient folks at Google bought the company for a figure reported to be over $2.2 billion dollars three months ago.
 
Google refused comment on the purchase price for “S.A.” but a representative did say that serious negotiations are in progress to purchase CelebrityApologies.com and PoliticalApologies.com.
 
“Really, today’s market is unlimited for apologies,” said the Google rep.

<< Back

Reader Responses
Jul 1, 2010 12:26 PM
Nino Stellari
How about some just add water  Mea Culpas  for Mariner hitters?  Man this opens up a whole new area, you could have the Swami write em.

Nino
Apr 19, 2008 1:18 PM
Frankie Java

When does PoliticiansApologies widget get launched?

Waterboard Bush!!

Apr 19, 2008 1:06 PM
lucid eye

Doesn't Goggle have something called a search engine? Don't you want eTrueSports.com to be found by that search engine? You oughta go to their new ParodyApologies widget and find a mea culpa you can send to them. Like NOW!

  • Sources close to Condoleezza Rice deny that the incoming NFL Commissioner is pressuring Dan Snyder to change his team's name to the Washington Mushroom Clouds.
  • The American Birther Party has withdrawn an invitation to former Chicago Bear player and coach Mike Ditka to address their annual convention in Idaho. "We can't afford to be embarrassed," a Birther spokesman told eTrueSports.
  • In Dog Show news, Sarah Palin has called for the banning of Afghan Hounds from all U.S. competitions. "They're foreign," explained Palin.
  • "A dream come true," a source close to the Cleveland Indians told eTrueSports about the media attention focused on the Washington Redskins offensive nickname.
  • "Karma's a bitch and she's got a long memory," a spokesman for the American Buddhist Society told eTrueSports after learning that Tiger Woods failed to make the cut in the 2014 PGA Championship.
  • Amazon Publishing announced it will release Jason R. Kidd's "Integrity in Life, Work & Athletics," with a forward by Skip Bayless, in time for the opening of the NBA 2014-15 season. "It's a quick read," said an Amazon spokesman.
  • Jason Kidd reportedly told the Nets he had been diagnosed with early-onset megalomania, and needed "to concentrate 100% on myself to get better and richer."
  • Antiseptic ointment giant Bacitracin is set to name Uruguayan soccer star Luis Suarez a national spokesperson, eTrueSports has learned.
  • After discovering his NFL health care plan doesn't cover concussions, commissioner Roger Goodell announced he will no longer call Native Americans "Redskins" to their faces.
  • Heard any good rumors?
    Email the publisher!