eTrueSports Logo Thursday, July 2nd, 2009
 
Read this storyStuck Roof Kills Wimbledon Grass
Wimbledon, England - The cheers for Wimbledon's new £80 million retractable roof over Centre Court turned to boos yesterday as fans returned to find dead brown grass in place of the lush green that the All England Club’s courts are known for. Read more...

Read this storyBeing Manny: Reality TV's Next Big Hit
Los Angeles – Sometimes violent. Always dumb. Being Manny, a reality TV show starring Manny Ramirez? Well, its coming to a Fox channel near you, from the producers of COPS. Read more...

Read this storyBrowns Blame Tainted Clorox For Jurevicius Infection
Cleveland - In response to a lawsuit from former wide receiver Joe Jurevicius alleging that unsanitary training facilities caused a severe right knee staph infection which may end his career, the Cleveland Browns announced they are in turn suing The Clorox Company for negligently producing tainted bleach used by the Browns. Read more...

Read this storyA-Rod: "I Never Get Tired Of Posing"
New York - Alex Rodriguez, who last weekend only pinch hit (once) in two New York Yankee games against the Florida Marlins due to fatigue, announced he will use his two game salary of $391,600.00 to commission a “good or famous” sculptor to produce a marble statue of himself. "I never get tired of posing." Read more...

Read this storyWarner Music Group Mutes Carmelo Anthony
New York - Following their controversial January decision to force YouTube to mute soundtracks on thousands of videos using Warner Music Group copyrighted material, WMG announced it will file a multi-million dollar lawsuit demanding Carmelo Anthony remove his WB tattoo. WMG insists it will mute all of Anthony's conversations until he complies with a cease and desist order. Read more...

Read this storySteelers' 1/4 LB Super Bowl Rings Prompt McDonald's Lawsuit
Oak Brook, Ill - “This is an obvious attempt by the Pittsburgh Steelers to capitalize on McDonald’s marketing campaign in support of our Quarter Pounder™ hamburger,” said a McDonald’s spokesman. “We demand that the Steelers organization immediately pull the rings from their players’ fingers. Read more...

Recent User Comments

Will responds to:
Being Manny: Reality TV's Next Big Hit
Prenancy! What a great reason for Manny not to run out ground balls. And Poofka, get a new name.

John Poofka responds to:
Being Manny: Reality TV's Next Big Hit
Why don't you guys lay off a Manny.  I bet you're gonna really feel bad when he gets pregnant.

John Poofka responds to:
A-Rod: "I Never Get Tired Of Posing"
I guess I'd need some rest, too, if were locked in such a fierce competition with David Ortiz for batting average and RBIs.  Get some rest, slugger.

Yo responds to:
Warner Music Group Mutes Carmelo Anthony
Suing someone IS a bidness model

Marina Mary responds to:
Maddon Defends Botched Lineup Card
I'm writing about that greatest, untold video.  Its a load of crap. Chicks didn't play baseball back then. Whoever wrote the video should be ****canned. 
  • Accused of having “too much baggage,” to drive at Daytona this weekend, beleaguered NASCAR driver Jeremy Mayfield pledged to restrict himself to carry-on luggage which he insisted could easily be stowed under his seat.
  • In yet another example of government-gone-regulation-wild, the FCC has ruled that 10% of commercial time during PGA events on CBS, NBC and ESPN be reserved for “non-erectile dysfunction” products.
  • Little League Baseball announced that Sammy’s Sluggers, a team from San Pedro de Macrois in the Dominican Republic, will be re-named The Junior Juicers.
  • The Wall Street Journal reported 325% stock price increases for Sweet Dreams Ear Plugs during Chris Berman's four days covering the U.S. Open on ESPN.
  • "Hey, we suck too," said Arizona Diamondbacks' manager A.J. Hinch, annoyed by the media attention the woeful Washington Nationals are receiving.
  • “Two babies are enough,” explained Madonna in announcing that with the acquisition of a second Malawi child she would abandon her legal efforts to adopt Yankee slugger Alex Rodriguez.
  • “Education should have no part in intercollegiate athletics,” said the NCAA in placing 16 University of Alabama teams and 201 athletes on probation for impermissibly obtaining free textbooks.
  • After learning that the lowly Washington Nationals drafted 100+ mph San Diego State pitcher Stephen Strasburg, advisor Scott Boras announced he was shopping the No. 1 pick to the Dubai Sheiks of the fledgling International Petro League. “Stephen doesn’t enjoy humidity,” explained Boras.
  • Former USC coach Tim Floyd will be a principal in a new financial services company directed at sports agents, The Stuffed Envelope Bank. “If your client can drain 3-pointers, we’ve got cash for you,” said Floyd.
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