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Murdoch: Wall Street Journal Sports Fit To Go Topless
NEW YORK - After being accused by British lawmakers of "not being a fit person" to run an international news organization, News Corp owner Rupert Murdoch announced today that his most prestigious publication, The Wall Street Journal, will add a daily "Hotties of the Big Board" column to its sports section. Read more...

NJ Woman Claims Not To Have Slept With Antonio Cromartie
EAST RUTHERFORD, NJ - Finally some good news for beaguered Jets' cornerback back Antonio Cromartie: Belinda Bromide, a stay-at-home pole dancer from Great Egg Harbor, NJ, has told eTrueSports that she has never slept with the serial procreator. Read more...

Guest Editorial: History's Worst All-Time Decisions
10. Believing in Bernie Madoff 6. Teaching Brett Favre to text photos 3. Dating Tiger Woods 2. Choosing Dr. Conrad Murray as your primary care physician 1. Believing in Bobby Valentine Read more...

eTS Vault: On The Road - NCAA Coverage, Vegas-style

Play Ball, Stop Motion

Top Nine Sox Icons Bobby Valentine Didn't Intend To Insult
7. Papi can flat-out hit. Imagine how good he'd be if he weren't so fat. 6. I got a lawn jockey smarter than Pedroia. 5. If emotional intelligence were so important Francona would still have a job. Read more...

Clemens Asks Supreme Court For A "Mulligan"
DALLAS,, TX - "Johnny, I goofed up, " an apologetic Roger Clemens said he told U.S. Chief Justice John Roberts in a private weekend meeting where Clemens asked for a "mulligan" from the Supreme Court. Read more...

Petrino Pledges To Keep Moving Until Housing Crisis Eases
Fayetteville, AK – In what is being described as a “courageous and selfless” decision, fired Arkansas Razorbacks football coach Bobby Petrino announced that he would commit to buying another house, his sixth in the last 11 years, as soon as he found an organization "dumb enough to hire me." Read more...

Breaking News: New Elvis Video for The Masters

Did A Woman Play For The Senators?

Read All the News!

Recent User Comments

Dukie4ever responds to:
Petrino Pledges To Keep Moving Until Housing Crisis Eases
She may be a Razorback, but she's no pig....

Yo responds to:
Petrino Pledges To Keep Moving Until Housing Crisis Eases
I think New Orleans' search may be over......

Jelly responds to:
Masters Menu Will Not Be Prepared by Ginni Rometty
Perfect skewering! Hmmm, good.

Jelly responds to:
Let's Go Trumps
Kill the Trumpire!

Fire Chief responds to:
Roethlisberger Out As Tiger's Caddie
Ben was a tad shaky on the difference between yards and feet ...

Masters special: Elvis classic: "In The Bunker"

Michael Phelps for The Clean Bong Water Foundation

Sources close to Albert Pujols say the Angels first baseman has informed the California Board of Elections that he has withdrawn his application to run for Mayor of Anaheim.

In Dog Show news, Republican presidential candidate Mitt Romney has called for the banning of Afghan Hounds from all U.S. competitions. "They're foreign," explained Romney.

Breaking news: Charlotte Bobcats' President of Basketball Operations Rod Higgins announced the team has applied to the NBA to change their name to the Charlotte Cadavers. "Whatever," commented owner Michael Jordan.

Church bells rang across Los Angeles on Tuesday as news spread across the city that Frank McCourt was officially no longer owner of the beloved Dodgers. "We never thought this day would come," an emotional parking enforcement officer told eTrueSports between sobs.

"Who knew?" said Charlotte Bobcats' owner Michael Jordan after learning that his team's NBA season had ended.

Former Bobcats' coach Paul Silas denied he had accused absentee owner Michael Jordan of being the worst human being in professional sports. "I said 'universe'," explained Silas.

Author Skip Bayless announced today he was suing Columbia University for not awarding him the 2012 Pulitzer Prize for fiction. "Their demand that I actually write a novel to be considered reveals them to be the frothing, rage-driven, scurrilous, paltering dickwad hypocrites they appear to be on television," explained Bayless in an interview with The New York Review of Books.

The Flat Earth Society has withdrawn an invitation to Marlins' manager Ozzie Guillen to address their annual convention in Miami. "We can't afford to be embarrassed," said a Flat Earth spokesman.

Mitt Romney has called on NASCAR to immediately begin running all races in a "clockwise manner." In a press release issued by Big Wheels For Mitt, a pro-Romney Super Pac, the Republican presidential candidate - the owner of "four, no, actually five Duesenberg convertibles" - explained that "turning left is always wrong, and I ought to know."

Heard any good rumors?
Email the publisher!

	Thursday, May 17th, 2012
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Murdoch: Wall Street Journal Sports Fit To Go Topless NEW YORK - After being accused by British lawmakers of "not being a fit person" to run an international news organization, News Corp owner Rupert Murdoch announced today that his most prestigious publication, The Wall Street Journal, will add a daily "Hotties of the Big Board" column to its sports section. Read more... NJ Woman Claims Not To Have Slept With Antonio Cromartie EAST RUTHERFORD, NJ - Finally some good news for beaguered Jets' cornerback back Antonio Cromartie: Belinda Bromide, a stay-at-home pole dancer from Great Egg Harbor, NJ, has told eTrueSports that she has never slept with the serial procreator. Read more... Guest Editorial: History's Worst All-Time Decisions 10. Believing in Bernie Madoff 6. Teaching Brett Favre to text photos 3. Dating Tiger Woods 2. Choosing Dr. Conrad Murray as your primary care physician 1. Believing in Bobby Valentine Read more... eTS Vault: On The Road - NCAA Coverage, Vegas-style Play Ball, Stop Motion Top Nine Sox Icons Bobby Valentine Didn't Intend To Insult 7. Papi can flat-out hit. Imagine how good he'd be if he weren't so fat. 6. I got a lawn jockey smarter than Pedroia. 5. If emotional intelligence were so important Francona would still have a job. Read more... Clemens Asks Supreme Court For A "Mulligan" DALLAS,, TX - "Johnny, I goofed up, " an apologetic Roger Clemens said he told U.S. Chief Justice John Roberts in a private weekend meeting where Clemens asked for a "mulligan" from the Supreme Court. Read more... Petrino Pledges To Keep Moving Until Housing Crisis Eases Fayetteville, AK – In what is being described as a “courageous and selfless” decision, fired Arkansas Razorbacks football coach Bobby Petrino announced that he would commit to buying another house, his sixth in the last 11 years, as soon as he found an organization "dumb enough to hire me." Read more... Breaking News: New Elvis Video for The Masters Did A Woman Play For The Senators? Read All the News! Recent User Comments Dukie4ever responds to: Petrino Pledges To Keep Moving Until Housing Crisis Eases She may be a Razorback, but she's no pig.... Yo responds to: Petrino Pledges To Keep Moving Until Housing Crisis Eases I think New Orleans' search may be over...... Jelly responds to: Masters Menu Will Not Be Prepared by Ginni Rometty Perfect skewering! Hmmm, good. Jelly responds to: Let's Go Trumps Kill the Trumpire! Fire Chief responds to: Roethlisberger Out As Tiger's Caddie Ben was a tad shaky on the difference between yards and feet ... Masters special: Elvis classic: "In The Bunker" Michael Phelps for The Clean Bong Water Foundation Sources close to Albert Pujols say the Angels first baseman has informed the California Board of Elections that he has withdrawn his application to run for Mayor of Anaheim. In Dog Show news, Republican presidential candidate Mitt Romney has called for the banning of Afghan Hounds from all U.S. competitions. "They're foreign," explained Romney. Breaking news: Charlotte Bobcats' President of Basketball Operations Rod Higgins announced the team has applied to the NBA to change their name to the Charlotte Cadavers. "Whatever," commented owner Michael Jordan. Church bells rang across Los Angeles on Tuesday as news spread across the city that Frank McCourt was officially no longer owner of the beloved Dodgers. "We never thought this day would come," an emotional parking enforcement officer told eTrueSports between sobs. "Who knew?" said Charlotte Bobcats' owner Michael Jordan after learning that his team's NBA season had ended. Former Bobcats' coach Paul Silas denied he had accused absentee owner Michael Jordan of being the worst human being in professional sports. "I said 'universe'," explained Silas. Author Skip Bayless announced today he was suing Columbia University for not awarding him the 2012 Pulitzer Prize for fiction. "Their demand that I actually write a novel to be considered reveals them to be the frothing, rage-driven, scurrilous, paltering dickwad hypocrites they appear to be on television," explained Bayless in an interview with The New York Review of Books. The Flat Earth Society has withdrawn an invitation to Marlins' manager Ozzie Guillen to address their annual convention in Miami. "We can't afford to be embarrassed," said a Flat Earth spokesman. Mitt Romney has called on NASCAR to immediately begin running all races in a "clockwise manner." In a press release issued by Big Wheels For Mitt, a pro-Romney Super Pac, the Republican presidential candidate - the owner of "four, no, actually five Duesenberg convertibles" - explained that "turning left is always wrong, and I ought to know." Heard any good rumors? Email the publisher! 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